Remaking “Red Dawn,” home of the world’s largest snot bubble

The movie Red Dawn is pretty much a 90-minute dose of Viagra for NRA dicks. And I mean that in every possible interpretation. That said, how do you not like a movie that features the largest snot bubble in cinematic history (a la Patrick Swayze)? 

Slate’s David Plotz has a nice piece about a possible remake of Red Dawn. He takes a look at the movie from today’s vantange point and is a little disturbed by what he sees.

But what’s most unsettling about Red Dawn today is not its infatuation with the warrior death cult. It’s that the movie’s historical parallels have been turned upside down. In 1984, the Soviets of Red Dawn represented, well, the Soviets, and the Wolverines represented both the Americans and also the plucky Afghan mujahideen then defeating the Red Army in a guerilla war. But on re-viewing, Red Dawn isn’t a stark reminder of Cold War fears. Rather, it’s a pretty good movie about Iraq, with the United States in the role of the Soviets and the insurgents in the role of the Wolverines.

But back to the snot bubble. Seriously. It’s amazingly huge.